Maldives, Zakar Nike and Mathematical Equations

Zakar Nike, the Talking Penis, states in his argument (part 1, part 2) with Nazim that "2 + 2 = 4", truly a mathematical feat by any standard. He also repeated the claimed that Maldives is a 100% Muslim country. Here is how the Mathematics works in such situations.

Hypothesis

Maldives is a 100% Muslim country

Axioms

• 2 + 2 = 4
• you are not extra smart
• Zakar Nike is always right
  

Calculations

Let

• P = population of Maldives
• M = number of muslims in Maldives
• K = kuffar (non-muslims) in Maldives
• R = ratio of muslims to the population

By definition

• P = M + K
• R = M / P

Hypothesis says

• R = 1 (100%) ⇔ M = P, P ∈ ℤ⁺

∵ M = P - K
∴ M = P ⇔ K = 0

But somebody publicly announced apostasy
∵ K > 0
∴ M ≠ P ⇒ R ≠ 1

Result

The hypothesis invalidated

How to solve this equation (Islamic Solution)

Make K = 0 ⇒ Kill all Maldivians who are non-muslims.

This solution is so versatile that it can be applied to other problems of the world. In fact, Iran already uses it to prove that there are no gays in Iran.

1. Poverty: kill all poor people
2. Hunger in Africa: kill all hungry Africans
3. Possibility of humans rejecting faith: kill all humans

Conclusion

Maldives is a 100% muslim country. It has got to be. A lot of the Maldivians believe so.

Maldivian Infidel

I am a Maldivian and I am NOT a Muslim

އަހަރެންނަކީ ދިވެއްސެކޭ، އަދި އަހަރެންނަކީ މުސްލިމެއް ނޫނޭ

Dr Allah

In Quran, Surah 26, Verse 80, it says

وَإِذَا مَرِضْتُ فَهُوَ يَشْفِينِ

And when I am sick, then He restores me to health.

So who the bloody hell made me sick in the first place? Oh yeah, that would be Allah too. What kind of a sick game is this Allah trying to play here?